20th July. We left London to go to Burlington. I sat in a Starbucks logged into the world. After lunch, we went to the Centre. After registration, we handed in our phones and other connections to the outside world. After a light meal went in to to receive instructions men and women live in separate dormitories. Two people to a cabin with a washroom to share and from that evening's session of sitting, we took the oath of silence.
21st July:
It was a struggle. The gong went at 4 am the next day and again at 4:20. I am alone with my thoughts. And I wrapped myself in my blue shawl and made my way through over the winding path towards the Dhamma Hall.
After the first day of 4 am sitting (always easier to meditate in the hall where the steady breathing of others keeps me on track). I was able to discern when I was awake and when I slipped into sleep.
One moment, I can hear the fan and then suddenly there is silence. It is like falling through a wall or wakefulness. I am here now and hearing the fan. And suddenly, I am in this peaceful place where there is no sound. The sudden realisation that I was able to differentiate between the two stages of wakefulness and sleep, were strange at first. That scared me, this new awarenessof ME and I thought to myself in that 4 am movement: maybe dying is this easy.
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